the pain`s still der,
yet noone noes.
all i hope ish baobei can faster receive moii letter,
sho tat you`ll noe tat ur still in moi heart.

nv b replaced. <3

WHHHEEEEEEE~

today`s a nice day!!

HAHS.

wen for MLB`s gathering at yishun.

^^

sho weird lahs.

it`s held at neesoon CC.

nbm.

hahs.

at firz was quite lost lahs.

xing and i reached the mrt station seein alot of ppl who look lyk those goin for the gathering de.

lolls.

and most of those tat we guessed were correct.

i mean they jux got those typical "FANS - look".

HAHS.

yupp.

aft they check the identies of the fans,

we all head towards the cc.

hahs.

sho sian lahs.

while we`re waiting for the lift, a uncle came out of the office and asked mi to pass 4 sheets of rock climbing flyers to biru(the i/c).

booo. and sho i took lors.

den in the middle of the gathering i passed it to her.

WEIQI came and kpo bout it sho i told him it`s rock climbin.

good for health. you shld take part. HAHAHS.

hahs. den wen up to the room, more sians.

we`re suppose to sit on the floor.

RAHHH. xing and i was wearing skirt lahs.

hahs. but suan le lahs. for the sake of MLB. (:

yupp. den awhile ltr MLB CAME IN!

WOOHOO.

the sight of NIC was lyk, OMG, IT`S NIC!

I`M SEEIN HIM IN PERSON.

gosh. i was really elated.

the way NIC smile, NIC tok were jux sho charming.

jux hardly can take moii eyes off him.

hahs. den we celebrated NIC`s buffdae.

cuz he`s buffdae comin.

the cake darn nice.

den NIC made wishes and cut the cake.

hahs. the way he slice the cake darn funny.

bo skill ehh. X=

den SAM and WEIQI helped him distribute all the cakes.

HAHS. while they were distributing.

somehow somewat i got to the front lahs.

sho i was practically snappin and snappin pix of them.

HAHS. den jux nice SAM stood in front of mi.

sho i was lyk "SAM. can i take a pix of you?"

den he was lyk "suresure" and he posed.

nerdy lookin face i wuld say. HAHS.

but cant deny tat it`s cute. c( x

den aft tat i targeted WEIQI. hee.

same qn same ans SAME pose.

"=.=

and smth tat`s even more SIMILAR ish tat aft i took SAM and WEIQI,

they hab the same reaction, they *twist*.

weird ya? lolls.

they`re jux SHO same.

hahs. cuz NIC was busy slicing the cake, i culd hardly ask him to pose for mi.

hahs. but i did ask in the end. hee.

HE`S JUX SHO CHARMING!

*melts*

yupp.

anyway at firz i got a cake frm SAM but i passed it to xing.

since it`s frm SAM. hahs.

den i got another one frm WEIQI.

they`re sho nice!

i mean the way they ask sho poliet and gentleman.

-SCREAMS-

yupp. den aft tat it was lyk free time lahs.

sho we wen ard snappin pix of them and ask them take foto with us.

HAHS.

i took alot of fotos with THEM!!!

weee.

noe wat?

wen i was takin with NIC, moi heart was lyk thumping sho fast.

habin him stndin sho near next to mi can really make mi melt.

but i found out tat SAM will distance himself wen he take fotos.

hahs. it`s oki. luckily not NIC. hahs!

and i took foto with WEIQI!

and guess wat he say?

he said i look lyk rainie yang chen ling.

at firz xing and i heard rain.

den we was lyk rain? weird.

moii eyes got tat small mehs?

den he was lyk RAINIE.

lolls. i see.

sho jux thnk him lors.

hahs.

aft walkin ard snappin pix and listenin to NIC tokin to a small grp of ppl,

i saw no crowds ard WEIQI. hahs.

sho i wen over to him and had chat with him.

he darn chatty lahs. lolls.

we talked abt his sch, his talents in graffity and his NS tingie.

hahs. WEIQI RAWKS mann.

sho nice.

yupp. but our conver. was interupted by the arrival of food.

hahs. all of us wen out.

hee. lookin at them eat made mi realise smth.

NIC`s eats more "man-ly"

while WEIQI and SAM`s more "si wen"

hahs. den aft eatin we wen in to play game.

the friz game was we, the fans hab to guess the pressie tat they brought for us.

a guy managed to guess correctly.

it was the mr bean`s bear with NIC`s name on it.

it was an accessory wen MLB sang bu xiang zhang da in one of the QF.

hahs. sho lucky lahs tat guy.

yupp. 2nd game was 6 of the fans were suppose to sing 6 diff songs tat MLB sang b4 all at one time.

den MLB are suppose to listen and guess which 6 songs are those.

hahs. SAM won and WEIQI was the worse.

poor WEIQI. hahs.

den 3rd game was a game suggested by NIC.

it`s called pass the message lahs.

ya. sho NIC whispered a sentence to WEIQI and WEIQI`S suppose to whisper to SAM.

and SAM muz whisper to another fans and the msg shld b passin until we say stop lahs.

ya.

in the end, the msg tat was passed was "NIC ish full of craps."

LOLLS! everyone luffed.

WEIQI say it was technically correct. LOLLS.

but actually the msg was "POLLY-POCKET ish quite a funn game but it`s childish and full of craps." smth liddat lahs.

DOINKS.

NIC says tat senetence jux came into his mind sho he said it lors.

lol!

LAMER.

ya. den the 3rd game was smth to do with maths de lahs.

i duno how to say. lolls.

WEIQI lost agn. poor ting.

hahs!

den aft the 3 games it was abt time lahs.

they need to leave sho ya.

hahs. kinda sad.

yupp. the pix tat i took today i`ll upload it asap.

sho stay tuned ya. LOLLS.

NIC jux rawks. (:

baobei, i`m really sorry.
sorry.
i really duno wats up with mi.
i actually forgotten tat today auntie wen to visit you.
i tot it was tmr.
shyt. sorry.
i`m really feelin bad abt it.
the tot of you not habin to hear wat i wana tell you
and the stop receiving of letter really hurts me.
i`m sorry.
i didnt meant to b tat way.
moii heart ish still with you.
i really hope you`ll still b able to feel it.

baobei, iLOVEyou. sorry. ):

i`m feelin really vehh terrible now.

how can i make such a mistake.

-heartaching-

bet noone will forgib the mistake tat i`ve made today.

even me, moiself also cant believe tat i actually made tat mistake.

it wasnt meant to b liddat.

hais.

shyt. wats up with me.

no words culd express the secret agony in my soul.

the feelin`s really terrible but yet,

it seems lyk ders noone i can confess to.

who wuld bother?

or rather who wuld even go the extra mile to try and understnd moii feelings and tots.

noone wuld.

i`m vehh sure.

suddenly feel sho alone.

no. i`m not cryin.

i cant.

not now.

cuz i noe ders no longer anyone der to wipe moii tears for me.

and i noe it`ll bcum a burden to ppl.

seriously all i wan isnt much.

jux someone der for me,

to listen and tryin to understnd moii feelings.

and someone whom i noe will always b der to see mi sulk wen i`m tired of smiling.

i used to hab such a person but somehow, it`s gone.

time can change anyting, even frenships.

guess tat`s wat i`m expriencing now.

nbm. as long as ppl see mi as how i m in the public.

tryin to tell moiself i`m oki. i`m alrite.

(:

no matter wat i MUZ b oki.

i cant b tat selfish to b not oki.

i`m sorry.

to the undeniable him,

(: happy birthday to moii dearest one.

[aug17`o6]

thou i wun b der to celebrate with you,

i promise aft 16more mths,

every of ur birthday i`ll b der for you.

aft sho long, many ppl tot i`ve got over you,

every short period der`ll b ppl askin mi

"ehh? still waiting?"

hahs. of cuz i m.

you`re someone too dear to mi.

i cant afford to lose you nor hurt you in tish way.

if you`re hurt, it`ll hurt mi more.

the reason i choose to speak less of your tings

ish bcuz it`s a fact tat noone will understnd OUR pain.

or mayb bcuz i no longer hab someone close to mi.

well, thou you`ve appearred less in moii conversation in others,

tat doesnt decrease the pain in mi.

till now, it still hurts as much as the day you wen away.

the reason i refuse to sit dwn and cry out loud ish bcuz

i noe i`ll b a burden to you if i do tat.

tat`s y i try vehh hard to convince moiself tat

noone will b here to wipe moii tears for mi even if i cry.

sho i cant cry. (:

no matter wat happy birthday.

iLOVEyou and it`s a fact tat will nv b changed. (:

HAHAHS.

I FEEL SHO ENERGETIC AFT SLPIN FOR 13 HOURS +!

^^v

tish whole wk had been hell for mi.

mugg mug AND MUG!

scary.

and as a result of not habin enuff slp,

i had to wear specs to sch jux to cover the damn obvious dark circles.

*roll eyes*

didnt wana scare anyone esp. tish mth.

HAHS.

and noe wat?

it actually gone to the extent tat i nearly puke wen i see the chem paper ytd.

now i realised smth,

i tink over stressing one self or lackin of slp

might lead to puking.

hahs.

tat happened to esther and eugene on eng paper.

cool. and i nearly.

HAHS!

anyway TO MR LARRY LEOW:

"YOU WASTE MY TIME(studyin), YOU WASTE YOUR TIME(markin),

WAT ESLE DO YOU WAN?"

-rahhh!-

feel sho played by him.

suan le.

i can predict moii whole prelims will b screwed.

HAHS.

ohh well, expected lahs.

hahs.

ytd was the 2nd las paper.

-CHEEERRRRSSSS-

heh.

aft the papers aiai, xing and i chiong baq hoem slp.

HAHS!

but i`m the only one who slpt the longest.

aiai insommia.

HAHS!

xing only manage to slp awhile.

c( x

i rawks.

yupp. and ard late evening liddat we wen to meet melvan and daren for dinner.

HAHAHS.

we wen GEYLANG! ^^

oki. sound sho wrong.

lolls. no lahs.

we wen der purely for food.

no other intentions.

HAHS.

and i ATE ALOT K!

i lost weight for the pass four days and i got it baq at once ytd.

or mayb even more!

-SOBS-

we had TIAN JI ZHOU for the main course,

damn the two bangalahs who told mi it aint spicy.

IT WAS K! YOU BANGALAHS!

but cant deny it turned out to b nice lahs.

X=

FRIED OYSTER as side dish,

AND LASTLY DESSERT!

DURRRRRIIIIANNNS!

hahahs.

daren and xing din eat.

spoiler. X=

hahs.

but daren was kinda enthu in helpin melvan,esther and i to open the durians.

thnks dude!

((:

yupp. and guess wat?

i only had four of it and i ardy feelin sick le.

melvan tat fangalah had the most lahs.

wonder how he survived.

scary puke whole night.

HAHS!

and aft the durians, the smell of it haunted mi the whole of las night.

YUCKS lahs.

lolls.

luckily i din dream of durians las nite.

-PHEWS-

horoscope from teens ; august

ARIES.

things are gonna get busy.

LOVE: a friend fancies you!

[XZEL` says: lyk real. X=]

FRIENDSHIP: your social life ish burstling with activity!

TAKE INITIATIVE ON :4 , 7

LIE LOW ON: 13 , 18

LUCKY COLOR: DARK BROWN.

[XZEL` says: ewww. wat a color. -suay-]

___________

TAURUS.

read between the lines.

[xzel` says: LOLLS! WTH.]

LOVE: express yourself!

FRIENDSHIP: friends gives you the encouragement you need.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 9 , 17

LIE LOW ON: 5 , 6

LUCKY COLOR: WHITE.

___________

GEMINI.

it`s a great time for an adventure!

LOVE: accept your partner for who he/she is.

FRIENDSHIP: a friend might get you out of a tight spot.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 2 , 11

LIE LOW ON: 7 , 19

LUCKY COLOR: GREEN.

[xzel` says: congrats xing. i guess tish mth you`ll b damn lucky cuz ur color`s green!]

___________

CANCER.

plans may get disrupted.

LOVE: there`s never been a beter time to fall in love!

FRIENDSHIP: minor disagreements might surface.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 13 , 22

LIE LOW ON: 9 , 12

LUCKY COLOR: BLAQ.

___________

LEO.

you seems to be more determined than ever to achieve your goals!

[xzel` says: woahh, chay chay. c( x]

LOVE: have you ever consider making the first move?

FRIENDSHIP: a close friend might leave the country.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 15 , 24

LIE LOW ON: 20 , 23

LUCKY COLOR: LIGHT BLUE.

___________

VIRGO.

your confidence ish soaring.

LOVE: someone special lurks close by.

FRIENDSHIP: friends demand your company.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 19 , 29

LIE LOW ON: 6 , 7

LUCKY COLOR: PURPLE.

___________

LIBRA.

your charm ish intriguing.

LOVE: learn to have more faith and trust in your partner.

FRIENDSHIP: you might blow your top at one of your chums.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 16 , 26

LIE LOW ON: 10 , 20

LUCKY COLOR: GREY.

___________

SCORPIO.

expect the unexpected!

LOVE: your partner never fails to intrigue you.

FRIENDSHIP:catch up on old time.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 5 , 22

LIE LOW ON: 17 , 23

LUCKY COLOR: BRIGHT YELLOW.

[xzel` says: fine. esther`s another one who`ll b lucky. >.<]

___________

CAPRICORN.

do your best!

LOVE: an apology can do wonders.

FRIENDSHIP: you might need a friend to help.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 27, 30

LIE LOW ON: 1 , 3

LUCKY COLOR: RED.

___________

AQUARIUS.

go with the flow.

LOVE: bumpy waters might strain your relationship abit.

FRIENDSHIP: you`re high in social demand!

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 8, 9

LIE LOW ON: 5, 29

LUCKY COLOR: ROSE.

___________

PISCES.

it`s dangerous to assume.

LOVE: let things happen naturally.

FRIENDSHIP: you long for your chums` advice.

TAKE INITIATIVE ON: 2,8

LIE LOW ON: 29 , 30

LUCKY COLOR: PALE YELLOW.

recently i`ve heard alot of tings which makes mi kinda emotional

and it kinda affected mi somehow.

hmm, it gimmes a feelin tat love`s veh fragile.

no matter wat kind of memories they once shared,

even if it`s the shwitest,

wen it`s time to end,

it`ll end.

hahs. sounds kinda crap

but wat i meant was wen it`s time end,

nth comes into his or her mind.

promises which they hab made in ta process *proff* gone.

actually wat was in moii mind was tat aft a period of time,

love has slowly becum a burden.

a burden to either of the one.

it`s lyk aft a long period, i tink the reason why the r/s or marriage culd contiune`s

bcuz everyting had changed into a responsibility.

one hab to take dwn the responsibilities on what he/she had said, do or promised b4.

err, it applies only on those sensible ones thou.

hahs.

ya. i`m not sure if you guys agree with mi or not but tat`s what i conclud

aft wat happened on mi b4 and wat i`ve head recently.

(( x

hahs.

i go watch vcd le.

goong`s nice! ^^

stupid.jux now post one entry end up not der.

RAHHH.

anyway, HEY PEEPS

I`M BAQQ!

^^

new blog ; new life ; new me.

GEE.

well, past few mths,

it have been lyk i`m on a roller coaster ride.

UP and DOWN i go.

and now i`m habin some difficulties to go up agn.

hahs.

but i`ve learnt alot during the process.

i`m no longer the naive gal tat ppl used to noe.

no longer see tings wonderfully,

no matter take tings as thou they`re perfect.

i`ve finally realised how cruel reality ish.

in moii eyes, nth will b perfect anymore.

and i noe moii life has totally change.

HAHS.

but no worries, i`m stronger den b4.

hehs.

i noe the fact tat no matter wat life has to go on.

^^

-CHEERS-